Some more pics

Tommy and Eva

The rainbow

This appeared in the hills above Puget Sound at the reception. Pretty cool...

Parson Dan and the Fire Boat

Parson Dan (the officiating minister) is also a Seattle Fireman. he had his buddies come out just after the ceremony and squirt water all over the place. Not sure if there's any symbolism there, but I figured I'd publish it...

Crazy drunken dancing people, er, except for the kids of course....

Pics of the ceremony

Look closely at this T Shirt

Demo wedding pics from this past weekend

Here are some pics from Demo's wedding...

True Headline this time...

"Searchers Find No Sign of Killer Shark"
http://www.wyff4.com/family/16020647/detail.html

Er...except for the dead guy?

A new blog...a must see!

This one comes courtesy of Tigerhawk, and is FANTASTIC!

http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com/

What the F is this?

What is this?

David Hasselhoff is New Spokesman for U.S. Beef Council…

Beverly Hills, CA –After months of searching, the U.S. Beef Council announced today that actor/singer David Hasselhoff will be their new spokesperson. Hasselhoff, 55, said he was pleased with the deal, and he looked forward to getting started soon. “I love beef, I eat it frequently, so this is a great fit for me”, the actor told us this afternoon. Hasselhoff’s agenda will help promote the consumption of beef by young and old alike. He is best known for his portrayal of lone crime-fighter Michael Knight in “Knight Rider” and a buff lifeguard in “Baywatch”, both television programs popular in North America in the 1980’s and 1990’s.

Hasselhoff also appeared in a candid video that featured him, severely inebriated, chowing on a Wendy’s cheeseburger. The video, filmed by his eldest daughter, was meant to convince him to cease drinking alcoholic beverages. It appeared on the Internet and quickly became popular. It was this video that led the U.S. Beef Council to consider Hasselhoff for the new position.

FASHION NEWS: Fundamentalist Mormon Ladies Spark Summer Fashion Trend

San Angelo, TX – Fashion Designers like Donna Karan and Tommy Hilfiger are buzzing about the hottest fashion trend for the coming summer season: Fundamentalist Mormon chic. The recent raid of a Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints in Texas has ignited excitement in the fashion world. Donna Karan said, “ We love the plain, clean lines, modest frocks, and simple color schemes. We are going to incorporate these themes into our summer line”. The women of the church typically dress modestly in accordance with their religious principles. Karan’s fashion group, DKNY, will market their new summer line under the brand name “Calling for Zion". Look for it in stores in May 2008.

Opening a Beer Bottle With a Chainsaw

very cool...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbK3-EfJd-w&eurl=http://www.tigerhawk.blogspot.com/

HUD Secretary Jackson Resigns to Spend More Time with Drinking Pals…

Washington, DC – Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Alphonso Jackson announced his resignation today. In a statement, Mr. Jackson said he feels a great deal of pride to have been a part of the Bush Administration, but that it was time to move on. Mr. Jackson said the job was a monumental strain on his relationship with several DC-area drinking buddies. “I am at a crossroads in my life, and I must make the right decision for the future”, the statement read. Mr. Jackson spends a large part of his time at Murphy’s Old Town, a tavern in Alexandria with several pals from his days as a student at Washington University’s Law School.

While at HUD, Jackson was credited with instilling a new commitment to ethics and accountability in the agency. President Bush issued a statement commending Jackson’s service. “ Alphonso has made a positive difference at HUD, and we thank him for his service”, the statement read.

Elderly Woman Blames Hot Flashes on Global Warming…

Boca Raton, FL – A Florida woman has blamed her recent hot flashes on global climate change. Bessie Mae Brown, aged 83, told us that she has experienced increasing episodes of the post-menopausal symptom as the earth has warmed. “I can tell as time goes by that my hot flush has increased, and I been around a long time”, Ms. Todd said. She became aware of the possible link between her symptoms and global warming after viewing the Al Gore moving picture “An Inconvenient Truth”. Hers would be the first confirmed case of global warming-induced post-menopause hot flashes. Scientists are studying her condition to determine if a link exists.

Golf Fan Trades Wife for Master’s Badge

Augusta, GA – In a move reminiscent of the popular 1993 movie “Indecent Proposal”, a man traded his wife for 24 hours in exchange for a 2008 Master’s golf tournament ticket. The couple, who wish to remain anonymous, told us that they met a ticket-broker at a Hooter’s Restaurant on Washington Avenue in Augusta. The broker agreed to accept the services of the wife in exchange for a one-day badge to the fabled tournament. Asked if this arrangement could cause problems in their marriage going forward, the man replied “Are you kidding? I got to go to the Master’s ‘sans’ the wife. We’ll do this again next year”. The wife told us that she was pleased with the deal and looks forward to her next trip to Augusta. As for what particular services were rendered in exchange for the ticket, the couple wouldn’t say. The leadership of Augusta National Golf Club officially frowns upon trading tickets among patrons, but they declined further comment.

Local Drunk Blames "Jesus Take the Wheel" Song for Car Crash….

Wando, SC – A local man involved in a car crash Friday night has blamed the Carrie Underwood hit “Jesus Take the Wheel” for the accident. The man told police that he had been drinking heavily at a local bar between 5pm and 11:30pm. On his way home, the man tuned his radio to a country station that was playing the popular country tune. “I was fairly drunk and felt that the Lord was speakin’ to me. So I let Jesus take my wheel”, the man said. Jesus, apparently in a bid to teach the man a lesson, turned the wheel off the road and into a bridge abutment. “I feel lucky I didn’t get hurt”, said the man. He has not been charged pending completion of the investigation.

New posts coming soon..

Sorry for no posts since Wednesday. I had to report to a local government office for political re-education. I'll have some more posts tonight...

Actor’s Head Explodes While Taping Sudafed Commercial

Santa Monica, CA – A horrible accident occurred today during the filming of a Sudafed Sinus Medication commercial. A spokesman for LIME Studios says that engineers and actors were filming an upcoming spot for the anti-histamine medication when something went tragically wrong.

The popular TV ads feature people suffering from head congestion. Their heads swell up until they take Sudafed, then the swelling goes down. An engineer who worked on the commercial told us “I just don’t know what went wrong. Everything was going like it always did when ‘BAM’, the guy’s head just exploded and showered us with all sorts of nasty brain tissue”. Filming of the ads has been suspended until the studio can figure out the cause of the accident.

The unfortunate actor has not yet been identified publicly pending notification of next of kin.